March 14, 2010
So I know I haven't been blogging on here like normal, but I've been thinking about finding a new site to blog on.. Well lets play catch up.. My dreams seem to be haunting me.. I have the same dream everynight, but with different place settings.. They scare my so, that, I have to wake up, but also haunt me in my waking state, bcuz all I can do is think about it! I wish these dreams would just go away!! The other night I had a break from the normal dream, but it got replaced with another scary dream.. I don't know whats the matter with me.. Could it be from all the horror movies I watch? I don't think so bcuz I haven't watched any in a long time.. Enough about that.. I've been trying hard to change my life around, trying to have a better outlook.. So far, it's been hard bcuz u have to deal with other people who want to bring you down or shift your mood not for the better, but for the worst.. I'm not going to give up.. Today is a new day and I'm gonna try harder and get myself in a place where I'm happy not with just myself, but with my surroundings.. Someone told me that how you treat your home and personal belongings reflects on yourself and your outlook on life..Make sense?? It does to me, So on my day off I'm going to be cleaning up my room and house and getting everything in order so that I can also get my life together :) ..
On a lighter note, I've decided that I am going to go ahead with making my youtube makeup videos.. So that should be fun, I might post them on here or I may start a new blogspot tp post them on.. So look out for that..
TWell thats the 411 on me :) til next time, ciao bella
Posted by Michelle Kipilii.
January 15, 2010
I have come to the realization that I'm not living in a dream.. That in fact my Grams has passed away.. What made it finally real and hit me was I seen her obituary online.. All I could do was cry.. Cry harder than before.. My Grams is gone.. My heart aches, my soul cry's.. All my life she has always been there, near or far, I knew she was there.. She help raise Me and Charla.. She was the only one who actually tried and pushed me to go back to school.. She helped me so much.. But most of al... Continue reading...
Posted by Michelle Kipilii.
January 8, 2010
Where were you at 2 o'clock in the morning on January 7th? I was sleeping only to be woken up by my Mom crying, I asked her what was going on, She told me that my Grams had past away.......................... HATE, ANGER, SADNESS, DEPRESSION, UNKNOWN, REGRET .. These are all the emotions I was hit with at once.. And they're still lingering around.. Hate And Anger.. Hate death. Angry at God.. Sad that she isn't going to be at the place I call home.. Depressed at the fact that I didn't get to see... Continue reading...
Posted by Michelle Kipilii.
November 10, 2009
Yesterday was a odd day.. I was in the car with my Mom and we were talking and she asked me why I've been so spaced out lately.. I told her that I've just been thinking about a lot of things.. She asked what I was thinking about and I told her that every time she talks to my Dad I hear him tell her that he brought this and that and blah blah.. For some unknown reason it bothered me.. I just don't understand things.. I don't understand why now, now that me and Charla are all grown up he can af... Continue reading...
Posted by Michelle Kipilii.
November 2, 2009
Hey folks.. Well I haven't updated my blog in a while.. So I figured I should do that :) .. Well Charla's birthday was good, she loved the gifts I brought her..It was very carefully thought out and planned.. Along with the card and steps in the card.. The one thing that was a no-go was the socks.. They were weird socks I found and they were reallllllllllly soft, but the inside was like falling apart, but my mom said it was from the way it was made.. Whatever.. I gave her the framed picture of... Continue reading...
Posted by Michelle Kipilii.
October 11, 2009
Charla's birthday is coming up in 2 weeks.. I've been beating myself up on what to get her.. every year I try to get her expensive things, My sister has expensive taste, lol. But this year instead of going for what would look good, I'm going to go with something from the heart.. I'm so excited about this gift.. I think it will be the best Birthday gift I have ever got her.. I just hope she loves it :) .. When I was a little girl
I thought about you and what we was going to do
Forever playing o... Continue reading...
Posted by Michelle Kipilii.
September 11, 2009
Hey guys.. So it's almost time for my favorite time of the year.. HALLOWEEN!! I'm not sure on what I'm gonna be.. But Im thinking either a ventriloquist dummy or something dead.. I wait all year for this holiday.. I love everything scary if u don't know that by now.;. Charla loves it too.. I think shes going to be a dead witch or something.. Whatever we do were going to have so much fun doing it.. Last year our pumpkins were so cool... Charla made them all glittery .. Well I can;t wait!!! Wha... Continue reading...
Posted by Michelle Kipilii.
September 7, 2009
So I know people try not to talk about Religion because it's like a touchy subject, But I just want to know you folks view on it.. Me personally I'm a little conflicted.. So I say I believe in god, not religion.. Some of you may see that as wrong or whatever.. But that's how I feel.. I didn't grow up in a "religious" house hold.. The only thing my parents did religiously was argue.. But my Mom always did read her Bible, but she never thought me about what she was reading.. My Mother is a Cath... Continue reading...
Posted by Michelle Kipilii.
August 31, 2009
So it's been a while since my last blog update.. Sooo.. Let's play catch up.. So my Mom has been in Hawaii for about a week now.. I can't wait for her to come back.. Even tho this break apart is good.. Cuz well, I love my Mom to death, but sometimes she can get on my last nerve and vise versa.. I have mixed feelings about my Mom coming back.. My Grams health isn't doing good right now and I know my Mom wants to be there, but she can't.. She has a job and a life here she needs to get back too.... Continue reading...
Posted by Michelle Kipilii.
August 17, 2009
As time passes by I find myself un-pleased with my career and life.. I took a step back and I looked at all my life and I decided that I really have to apply myself to get done what I need to get done.. No more "pussy footing around" I guess you can say.. I need to get a different and better job.. I need to go back to school.. I don't need to be certified to be a MUA.. It's looks better and I'll learn a lot more.. But I just want to go to college and just learn more really.. I know there's a ... Continue reading...
Posted by Michelle Kipilii.
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About Me
I gave this blog section the title of: A look into a chaotic mind, simply bcuz my mind is very chaotic.. I'm a very deep thinker.. I have a very dark side to me, I also have a very bubbly and cheerful side.. You never really know what side your going to come incontact with.. So in these blogs you get to see and know a little of whats really going on in this head of mine..
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